Romance

Special days are the hardest.

I couldn't be with my baby on valentines...but we had our own little evening together, sent each other cards and gifts, gifts that we had put more time and effort into than money, and it was really nice :-) But it wasn't being there with each other. The only positive I can take from it is that there is no way I will ever take this girl for granted, because being apart makes me appreciate the value she holds in my heart :-)

We will make up for missing valentines when I get to see her in March. That and our anniversary and her birthday. wow. I hope never to not be in her life for the rest of these special occasions. God I love her!

Weekends are the best chance we have to talk to each other because neither of us has school, thats why it means so much when we do have a really long Friday together on the webcam :-) Unfortunately sometimes we don't always get the chance, but its at least comforting to know that I will (hopefully) always be in her mind, in the same way that I'm constantly thinking about her!

Lent starts soon...what to give up? For me its going to be alcohol, I'm not an addict or anything but do drink, tho a lot less now than in my old student days ! It should be easy, but it means more to me that the next time I have alcohol will be a glass of champagne or wine or cocktail or beer when I'm in a restaurant with my baby :-) And yes we've already picked the restaurant and pretty much chosen what we're gonna eat. Are we excited? you bet!

OK - -

Happy Valentines to the one I love so much, my baby, my sexy baby butt, my wonderful girlfriend Nicole!

It might not be a prize winner but it makes me happy to see it :-)

<3 <3 <3 xxxxx xxxxx xxxxx

Block

Nicole: you haven't written on the blog for ages
Me: I don't know what to write about...
Nicole: Just write what you feel


So here goes, I'm not writing a blog that will educate, advise or be publishable but it will be my truth.I've had a bit of writing block on here, simply because I was worried that what I write will be no good or have no relevance. So I shall describe everything I've thought about today...nicole based of course...

Welll I woke up, then fell back to sleep. Yeah Nicole was able to tell me everything that had happened between me sleeping and waking up, and I was very proud of her achievements...then did I make her feel loved and needed by staying awake and talking to her? Maybe playing a little online game? or just listening to her talk? No. I fell back asleep. And now I regret it mucho because she's going to be waking up and getting ready for school, then going to school, then it'll be my night time and argh its a bleeding nightmare!! The amount of times that I sit here watching her sleep feeling like I want to wake her up is mammoth, but I don't do it because a) its actually difficult as hell! b) I know she needs sleep because more than likely she has stayed up late to see me when I wake up. But I always wish upon a wish she will wake up so I can talk to her...and sometimes it makes me feel greedy for always hoping / expecting her to be awake and ready to talk to me yet I struggle so much making the same commitment for her, like I hate how she is alone at night in her apartment all the time whilst I sleep. But as Nicole commented before, that is the harsh reality of an 8 hour time difference :-( The weird thing is that I always crave her attention and awakeness, and then sometimes when she does wake up I'm inattentive and neglectful --> its like WTF? I have no idea why I do it but it must feel like poo for her :-( So this is my promise...no more shall it happen! When baby is online its ME and BABY time only. My work [by which I of course mean the procrastination that work brings] will be done in other hours or when baby has work too.

Anyways so I have my plan, stay up late tonight to protect my baby from the stalker, to spend time talking to her, and I shall pretend to try and get some work done.

Jonny :-) x x

p.s. I hope if I "accidently" unmute my microphone she might wake up...." heheh joking

tough times.

Ah, i know i've been slacking on the blog updates lately. school's really consumed my life, and i find that sleeping isn't exactly making the most of my day. It's funny how now whenever I look at the time I always think in PST and GMT. So right now, its 11:39pm/7:39am. Time difference is probably one of the hardest things out there. In the beginning of this whole long distance thing, everytime something crazy happened, I always had the urge to call Jonny, but realized that he was sleeping. I wake up, he's eating dinner, he wakes up, I'm going to sleep. An eight hour gap is ridiculous. Nights are lonely. Mornings seem time limited. But I guess it's all apart of the process. I met a woman on the plane to England over winter break, and she was whining about how her boyfriend lived in New York and she lived in LA, and that a 3-hour time difference was really hard to deal with sometimes because her boyfriend went to sleep at 8pm her time. The whole time I was just like, well my boyfriend goes to sleep by 4pm, and I'm usually in school or have only been up for a few hours. But we do make tons of sacrifices, and it seems lately Jonny hasn't been getting much sleep in order to stay up or wake up early to talk to me. I know it's taking a toll on him because it just seems like he's so tired all the time. :( blah...
Anyway, the dreaded Valentine's Day is coming up...eek. Another reminder that our relationship is not normal. The only thing getting me through all this is the fact that this may be the only year that we'll have to spend Valentine's Day apart. We're both preparing packages for each other, so that's something to look forward to. I really do love Valentine's Day, I really do. I've got like 10 cards to prepare and mail out before midterms and better do that asap. Okay, it's getting late, class at 8am-6:30pm. busy busy, but at least my weekend starts tomorrow! Sweet dreams & happy thursday.


(weird fact: sexsomnia is a condition of having sex in your sleep, like sleep walking, sleep talking, sleep eating...ridiciulous!)

Communication!

Hello hello hello!

Communication: the imparting or interchange of thoughts, opinions, or information by speech, writing, or signs.[dictionary.com]

In any relationship communication is important, now neither me nor Nicole are relationship experts and we in no way aim to purport that we are through this blog, in fact quite the contrary, we are just trying to give people hope of long distance relationships through our own experiences!

When in a long distance relationship communication becomes even more important because without the touch of your other half it can make you feel lonely and unloved, hearing the words "I Love You" can really really help, or at least it can turn my mood around in a minute. There are many ways of communication out there and modern technology helps incredibly! Not to mention how in a long distance relationship calling can be extremely expensive! These are some of the methods we have adopted but are not an exhaustive account of various methods!!


BlackBerry IM: As we both own BlackBerrys we save a fortune by not having to SMS each other. This acts like any other Instant Messaging service and works across the globe for FREE (as long as you have the BB package in your phone bill and of course unlimited mobile phone data package). The text is small yes, but writing little messages to let the other know what we're upto, or if we can't get on the phone for whatever reason. This is REALLY HANDY! In addition if you have an internet enabled phone but not a BB simply download MSN, AIM, SKYPE or any other software which contains an IM facility. We do use AIM for when BB doesn't work (yeah nothing is perfect)

Email: Fairly obvious but it can be a really nice surprise to find an email in your inbox from a loved one, it just makes you feel all appreciated! Also the introduction of E-Cards is also a cute way to send a loving message, just do not try and replace their birthday card or anniversary card with an E-Card --> its just tight and very unromantic! I felt really happy though receiving an E-Card from my baby, especially as I was at Uni at the time so it was an awesome surprise! Email is really handy if you want to send an attachment too, like in the past I've drawn silly pictures in Windows Paint and sent it to Nicole! One good thing is that the email will be sat in their inbox waiting for them when they get to work, or get home and check their personal emails, so its like leaving a surprise for later!

If you have a camera phone and email on your phone then use email to send little pics to your other half, these can range from:
a) Heres a pic of the dinner I made last night
b) This is me trying on a new shirt, do you like it (helps recreate the experience of shopping together, sort of...)
c) Hi here's a naughty pic of my [insert rudey bit] --- I miss you!

All of them are fun to send and receive!

Post a letter/card: I love surprising my baby by sending her a letter or card in the mail, not just on special occasions but literally whenever I feel like sending a surprise! Its worth bearing in mind the delays in international posting, so after you send the first one make a mental note of how long it takes, then add a day or two and keep this as your deadline for future posting. I actually wrote in my diary the latest dates I should post something when I had planned Christmas surprises so I had a handy reminder!

If you make the effort to write a letter it will be appreciated by your other half! It doesn't have to be poetry or Shakespeare but just write down how you feel, or keep it to mundane little social commentary, whatever you're happy writing I'm sure your partner will love reading! If you are stuck for inspiration write about something the two of you did together as a reminder of the good times when you're with each other. I keep everything my baby sends me, be it a letter or a card!

Phone calls: Nothing beats hearing your partners voice at any time of the day! If you are in the same country then make sure you get the most economical phone package you can, in the UK if you wait until your contract ends then you are in a prime position to barter with the phone company, get extra minutes and reduce your overall bill cost, seriously be tough with them as they do NOT want to lose a customer. Anyway if you are in an international long distance relationship then definitely look into the packages that Skype offer, I pay £3.75 (ish) a month and get unlimited (upto 6 hours a day) phone calls to USA landlines or mobiles. However I know Nicole can't get the same deal with skype from the USA to UK. In addition to dialling from my computer I have got a local rate number saved in my phone which I can call, which only costs me the same as local minutes, and I purchased an LA number which Nicole can ring from her phone which using her local minutes and calls my computer [for a small fee I can get these calls forwarded to my mobile phone]

Isn't technology wonderful! Alternatively you can buy specific international phone cards or mobile phone sims with cheap international calls. You have to do a little internet research and find the best deal for your situation!

Webcam : Using software previously mentioned such as Skype and Aim you can video (or just talk) chat for free for as long as you wish! Very nice to see your other half even if it is unfortunately on a computer screen! It allows a bit more interaction such as showing off a new item of clothing, or just being able to see a smile :-)

To be honest I love the webcam and it makes me feel a lot closer than I would without, seeing that my baby is safe and all right makes me feel happier...plus I just love her cute little face and so the webcam is a godsend!

Social websites:  Twitter, facebook, myspace, whatever takes your fancy you can use to leave each other sweet little messages or pokes or just tell the world how you feel about the other person!

O.K. I think that covers most of the options which we choose and use frequently, good luck comrades!

Jonny x x

the continuation to an 'oh so predictable story'

haha, well i'm sure jonny's suspensful cliffhanger left everyone (or just me and him considering we're the only ones who probably read this) on the edge of their seat. yes, i did ask jonny out to drinks. i don't really know why i did. there was just something about him that made me want to be around him more and more. :) so i used his birthday as an excuse to take him out to drinks, which in England, everyone does instead of dinner dates and stuff. so we arranged a night to go out, and of course, jonny being a typical guy, didn't contact me til late afternoon of that day and asked if we were still going out and of course i said sure why not, even though i was kinda annoyed that he was so last minute on reassuring we were going through with it. so he came over to mi casa, we walked down to this cider boat on the river in bristol called the apple. yum cider! drank a buncha drinks for four hours with lots of non stop convo. then he walked me back to mine and we awkwardly were like uhmm, ya let's go somewhere else (note: by this point we were both sloshed and so my account of this part of the story may be sorta fuzzed up) so we went to this place called Agora, which is some little room with chairs, a bar, and music. We got some screwdrivers and we were talking and I think I drunkenly told Jonny about how my flatmate had warned me about him from the beginning, and how he was a player and hooked up with lots of girls. gross right? so why did i even bother to date this guy? i guess because i felt as if i didn't want anything serious in bristol, and going out with a player made it easy and simple because: 1. i liked the challenge and 2. anything you can do i can do better. haha but he reassured me he wasn't which of course any guy in the world would do/say. so after he walked me back to my place (which was down the street) and i wish i knew how, but we kissed. and then a homeless woman went up to us and asked us for a handout, and so we said no sorry, moved to the side door, and continued. hahahaha and ever since then it was drama and a battle to keep our relationship casual -- because after all, i was only studying there for the year, and was leaving in july. ugh, i swear i must've said that phrase about a bazillion times when i was in bristol. i always thought about the end, but i guess i had to in order to keep myself safe. look at me now. :) but i wouldn't take anything back.

♥, nicole